EP 155 My Birthday Dream for You
Resources Mentioned in Episode:
- Mothers of Creation - Join us September 26th in Provo, Utah | Use coupon code MOTHER at checkout to receive $50 OFF | Expires at midnight on Monday, 5/18
It's my birthday today. And every year, since it falls right around Mother's Day, this ends up being one of the most self-reflective times of year for me.
So today I want to tell you a story. My story.
I grew up in a home full of love, but books weren't part of our culture.
I made it through twelve years of public school without ever hearing of Anne of Green Gables, the Little House series, or Narnia. And then my senior year, I got a teacher who actually wanted to make me think.
We read The Brothers Karamazov, and that book cracked something open in me that I didn't even know was closed.
It took almost ten more years (and three babies) before I found the kind of education that asked the right question. Not what did you learn but how is this supposed to change you?
That question changed everything.
On this week's episode I share all of it: where I came from, what I was missing, and the dream I carry for every mom who finds her way to this work. Here's a little of what you'll hear:
- The one teacher who finally asked me the right question
- Why working on yourself is the least selfish thing you can do for your children
- The dream I hold for our culture and what becomes possible when moms start thinking differently
I invite you to listen to this episode.
I’ve never shared this part of my journey and I hope it resonates with something inside you.
AI Generated Transcript
It's My Birthday, and I Have a Dream I Need to Tell You About
It's my birthday today. And every year it lands right around Mother's Day, so this time of year tends to make me really reflective. I find myself thinking about where I've been, where I'm going, and what I really want for the women in my life -- including you.
I want to tell you a story today. A personal one. And then I want to share a dream with you -- a dream I've been carrying for a long time.
I Was a Decent Student Who Asked All the Wrong Questions
All growing up, I was a pretty decent student. I didn't love school, but it was just part of the reality around me. It was the world I lived in. It was what everybody did. You get up in the morning, you go to school, you do the homework, you pass the test. That's just the nature of reality, right?
By the time I got to high school, though, I was pretty disenchanted by the whole experience. I started asking the questions that so many of us ask: Why in the world do I need to study calculus? Who cares what year the French and Indian War started? Why does Hamlet matter so much?
And I did what everybody does. I kept going. I kept doing the work so I could get into a good college, because somewhere along the way I'd come to believe that college was the real goal of it all. That's where education got good. That's where learning was actually fun.
And then my senior year, something happened.
The Teacher Who Changed Everything
I got a teacher who was different from any other teacher I'd ever had. He wanted to make us think. And he cared about what I thought. It was the first time in my 12 years of public education that I began to ask the right question -- how my learning was supposed to change me.
We read The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky, and that book changed my life. I know that might sound dramatic, but you have to understand where I came from.
My father grew up in a tiny town with a graduating class of 10 people. He went to one semester of college, then came home and married his high school sweetheart. After five children and about 11 years, when their marriage was failing, he met my mom.
My mom also came from a small town. Her father was an alcoholic who had abandoned the family, and she had one sibling -- a sister who was schizophrenic. She, her mother, and her sister scraped by all growing up. They cooked on a wood-burning stove in the 1960s. My grandmother never even learned to drive.
When my parents married and had five more children together -- I'm the oldest of that group -- with no good income-earning skills and a growing family to provide for, we struggled financially, especially when I was young.
Now, I want to be clear about something. There was a lot of love in my home. I never thought of myself as poor or going without things. My older siblings from my dad's first marriage visited every summer, and I always looked forward to seeing them. But the net result of all of it -- the backgrounds of my parents, the circumstances we were in -- was that lifelong learning, self-education, and reading were simply not part of the culture in our house.
I knew my mom sometimes read romance novels. My dad would occasionally mention a sales or self-help guru he was following. But I don't remember there being very many books in our home at all.
I Didn't Even Know Anne of Green Gables Was a Book
In college, the Anne of Green Gables series was released, and my girlfriends gathered for a sleepover to binge-watch them all night. It was only at that sleepover that I even heard of Anne of Green Gables. I had no frame of reference for that whole experience.
I had never heard of or read the Little House books. I thought it was a TV show. I had never heard of the Narnia series. These were books that were left out of the public school program, so I was never introduced to them.
And that is why, when I read The Brothers Karamazov, it hit me so hard. I didn't know that books like this existed. Books that spoke to the deepest parts of me. Books that discussed the most important questions of life. Books about people who were seeking truth, grappling with real temptations and real struggles.
I had no idea the impact that true classics could have on a person. I didn't know they could help me understand myself, build my character, or become better. It was honestly pretty magical. And the only thing that had ever spoken to me in that same way before was scripture.
Thirty Years Old, Three Babies, and Just Getting Started
After high school, it took me almost ten years to discover liberal arts education. There I was, 30 years old with three babies in tow, just getting started on my real education. But it didn't matter. Because I knew it could give me what The Brothers Karamazov had given me: truth, virtue, beauty, character, and deep personal growth.
So that's my story. And here's my dream.
My Dream for You (and for All of Us)
My dream is that every mother and every woman would have what I received.
You and I both know that our culture is declining. We see it in the media, in our educational programs, even in our leaders -- things moving further and further away from what is right and true and good. We worry about our children. We worry about the future.
And so many of us feel powerless to change any of it.
Who am I? I can't tell you how many times I've asked myself that. I'm just one person. Just a stay-at-home mom. Just a working mom. Just a single mom doing her best to hold everything together. I can't fix the world. I can't even fix dinner.
But here's the irony. When we work on ourselves, we make our culture better. Because we raise the next generation, and they are watching us every single day. Who we are, who we are becoming, and the example we are setting -- it means everything to them. And to our culture.
And the best part? We don't have to do this alone. We can link arms and lift ourselves and lift our families, and that will lift the culture.
What We Were Never Taught (and Why It Matters So Much)
Here's what I know. You and I did not get the education that empowers us to discern and live by truth. We were not taught how to take the best works ever written and harness their lessons for our lives. We didn't receive the training we deserve -- to be self-educating for life, to know what to read and how to read it, how to discern truth in our culture, and how to be changed for the better by it.
We weren't taught the tools for understanding and practicing principles. And that deficiency in our education -- that gap in our ability to meet our real mental and spiritual needs -- is a huge roadblock in our personal growth. It makes it harder to lead ourselves and our families with confidence and clarity and purpose.
So my dream is that every woman and mother will learn how to think differently. Because when we think differently, our beliefs change. And when our beliefs change, everything changes.
My dream is that our families will be strengthened and our communities will be blessed. That there will be more truth and goodness in the world because of our presence in it -- as mission-driven women who know how to harness truth to heal ourselves, our families, our communities, and the world.
Come Spend the Day With Me This September
So please join me. Please take your education and your personal growth more seriously. Please link arms with us in making the world a better place. I know we can do it -- one mother, one woman at a time.
And if you're ready to start, I'd love to invite you to spend the day with me this September in Utah at our Mothers of Creation conference.
You will be surrounded by women just like you -- on this same mission to develop themselves and link arms in lifting our culture. You will leave with renewed hope and excitement, not just for your own future, but for the future of our nation and our world. You'll walk away with real skills, tools, and principles for putting your own life in better order. And I promise you will leave empowered with clarity about your next steps -- and new friends to walk the path with you.
As my birthday present to you, I'm offering $50 off -- but only through tonight. The link is in the description.
Thank you for being here. Thank you for caring. I'll see you next time.
